Not The Arts Council of Northern Ireland

Monday, March 27, 2006

A crowd estimated at several, gathered outside the cyberspace occupied by Not The Arts Council to mourn the passing of a misguided attempt to promote the utopian vision of a healthy environment of the arts in Northern Ireland. Earlier in the day, a leak of this news had prompted virtual buckets to be placed under the web address. In an eerie echo of this action, many of the mourners were reported to be weeping buckets - a medical condition described as 'very painful' by Doctor Thebooks. The outgoing Chief Executive, Roisin McDoughnut, announced that "Not The Arts Council has had its day. It was last Tuesday and we all enjoyed it greatly." The former social activist, McDoughnut had tears in her eyes caused by excessive laughter at having got away with it for so long. "I am off to spend more time with my salary" McDoughnut is quoted as saying "It's been fun, but at the end of the fiscal year, we have all had a good look at the books and we can leave the scene secure in the knowledge that the future of the arts in Northern Ireland is non existent thanks to our efforts. Sometimes in virtual life it's best to go when you are universally disappointing. My only regret is that others don't follow our lead."
Tributes can be sent to No flowers please. Donations can be made to the arts in Northern Ireland, but we really don't see the point.


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